Wednesday, 26 November 2014

Oh give me a break!

Don't really mean to have a rant, but have you ever had a time, when you felt your brain was just so addled, you feel completely lost?  Or felt enwrapped in some thick fibrous tissue of someones's life, and you feel like you were suffocating?

Well, thats been me, these last few weeks!

I feel utterly exhausted by the stress caused by someone elses' agony and frustrations.  I cause  no real stress to myself, it is always someones elses'.  They bring it to my door, down the phone line, by internet, and in the case of my ex husband - from within the home.  But I don't want to hear it!  I just simply don't want to hear it... anymore.

I keep myself way, quiet and unnoticed, just calmly trying to deal with crap that's already in my life, again ex husband, but that's not enough.  Doesn't matter how many times or ways I try to say 'enough', the words, fall, on deaf ears.  I can never get my head round that!

They can see I am mentally drained, and so so tired, but it would seem that ONLY I know the solutions to their problems.  As always.  They don't have to think, why should they?  They have me, drop of a hat, first person to call.  I never proclaimed myself to be the Oracle, and neither do I want to be, it sounds like a bloody hard job.

I just wish that just every now and then, they could come to their senses, and for a change; just stand on their own two feet for a while, just try it out, see how it feels, and get used to the idea!  I know it would be a huge relief for me, because right now I feel like I 'm struggling to breathe.

Just a breath of fresh air, of sweet, quiet harmony, would be enough to recharge my batteries, so that I can sparkle again!  Sx